Monday, September 17, 2012



When I was a sophomore in high school, my world revolved around friends—they were everything to me. My social life was awesome and I had a fun group of friends that were inseparable. Yep. I loved my friends and my friends loved me… or so I thought.

One day I was talking on the phone with one of my friends. All of a sudden, my mom came in the room, grabbed the phone out of my hand, hung up, and sat me down. She told me she was really worried about me and the way I had been acting with my friends lately. She said I was starting to gossip on the phone about my own best friend and that it just wasn’t me.

Usually at that age, I just tuned out to a lecture, but this caught me so off guard that I couldn’t help but wonder what she was talking about. My mom had overheard my phone conversation which, in my eyes, seemed harmless enough. However, it consisted of criticizing everything about one of my best friends—from her physical appearance to her personality—we had ripped her apart behind her back. My mom flat out said, “Here you are talking about one of your best friends like she is your worst enemy. What do you think these friends say about YOU, Cami?”

Suddenly my eyes were opened. I had been so blind at who I had become. Here I thought I was such a good friend but really I was the worst kind of friend. You see, gossip has a funny way of slowly creeping into conversations with our girlfriends and it seems so harmless at first, especially if what you’re saying is true. Then it just grows like a nasty weed, setting traps along the way to destroy the very person you are.

That’s exactly what happened to me. I had a wake-up call and I realized that I was so completely insecure with myself that I felt the need to tear my friends down with me. After that, I knew I wanted to change, but I also knew it was going to be hard.

Over the next several months, I worked really hard to build my own self-esteem and, to be honest, it was based on being true to MYSELF. Oh my gosh, it was so hard to dig down deep and realize who I really was, but as soon as I started figuring out that I was worth something as an individual (regardless of who my friends were), I felt so happy. I felt like I had something to offer other people—a genuine smile, an interest in who they were, a kind word, service, etc!!

We are strong, beautiful, KIND women. Stop gossiping. Do not tear other girls down!! We need to lift each other and encourage each other. For some reason, that can be really hard to do, but I know when you dig down deep and realize that you are worth something more, your eyes will be opened, too!

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